You want me to manage someone?

I remember when I was first given the chance to manage another engineer in the team. I was so excited to get the opportunity but also felt like I'd been sent to space without any idea of what to do when I got there.

This isn't me trying to fault my manager or the company I was at, but more focusing on the fact that even if you have read all the documentation and books you can get your hands on, the first time you sit in a 1-1 meeting that you are meant to lead it is a big shock.

I reflected on how previous managers I'd enjoyed working with handled that initial chat. And it helped me form some pieces of advice I think could be useful to any new manager out there.

Get to know each other

This one seems rather obvious but is very key. You want to understand where this person has come from, their experience, how they feel about it and where they're looking to go. This is a great time to discover what they enjoy doing at work. Everyone is different and this is how you can work out what projects you could suggest to a person, or what team they might work best on.

It's also a great time to let them know a bit about you. Being a manager is a two-way relationship and it's important they understand a bit about who you are, what you can support them on and also that you're just another human like them at the end of the day.

This can also be a great time to drop in the message that if they are struggling, be that with a piece of work or their mental health, you are there to talk to and will be open to helping out where you can.

Understand their communication style

This was one I hadn't come across until my most recent manager, but since he asked me this it made me wonder why no one else had before.

It is as simple as asking the person how they most prefer to receive feedback, both positive and negative. Do they prefer a written message so they can read and process it before coming back to you, or would they rather do it via a call/in person so they see facial expressions and ask follow-ups easily? It's good to know this before you have to deliver constructive feedback to take away one of the points of friction.

Learn what they want

This comes in two forms; what is their planned career direction and also how do they want their check-ins to run?

Let's start with the easier one... One-to-one meetings are largely there for the person you are managing, so they should be able to dictate some of how they work. Some will want a weekly chat, others will find this too much and want longer gaps. The time of day or point in the week can also vary from person to person. I love mine early morning, at the start of the week. But, I know most others in the company have theirs in the afternoon at the end of the week.

The most challenging topic is talking about what they want from their career. You'll ask some people where they want to be in five years and they'll know it right away. With other people, you might need to dig deeper with more direct questions and suggestions and they may not come to a full conclusion. But if anything, that tells you it is something you need to work on in future one-to-ones to help them work out what they want to try their hand at.

Being a manager for the first time is hard and I think everyone's experience will be different. But these suggestions helped me when I first started out, so hopefully they could help you too.